I had not seen my dietician since last September, we did all our "appointments" over the phone or via e-mail. This also means that September was the last time that I got weighed.
I knew that I had lost quite a bit of weight with all my GP problems in the past six months, but I wasn't too keen on finding out how much. Last Friday I finally bit the bullet and went to see my dietician.
And I am really glad I did. At first I was a bit surprised when she sat down in front of me and started pulling my skin on my hands and arms. However, she was all excited claiming that she had never seen me like this before - this is the first time that I am at a true weight - meaning that I have lost most of the extra water that I have been carrying around. For two years she has been trying to get me to lose my excess extracellular water, trying me on really high protein diets that were not helping. I have started to lose some water when I was first put on a semi-elemental formula, but at that time I was not feeding fulltime. After a month of j-feeding fulltime my oligopeptid formula I am now finally able to absorb all the protein and therefore lost the excess water. A BIA analysis confirmed my now more optimal body composition.
Of course she weighed me too and yes I have lost quite a bit of weight and am now back to being classified weight. But she said that even though I weigh less, I am actually better nourished now, as my body is finally able to use the protein it gets.
I am bit ticked off that I have to gain weight again, seems like I have been doing nothing but losing and gaining weight for more than half my life (at least now it's for different reasons). Don't get me wrong, I want to gain the weight back, as I don't feel comfortable being that skinny. It's just that gaining weight for me means lots and lots of calories because I am a really hard gainer. It's so unfair that I lose weight so easily, but gaining it back takes months...
I am also a bit sad, as I was at a really good weight last summer, almost a perfect weight to get pregnant at. Now I am far away from a safe weight for pregnancy which means that my plans are being postponed a bit.
In other tube feeding news:
I am up to 100 ml/h during the day time and 80 m/h while I am sleeping. This works out quite well so far. I still need to raise my rate during the day to start gaining weight though. I have been experimenting with different soups, also watered down blended vegetable soups (zucchini, squash, carrots), and that has been going quite well for me. Other than that I don't really eat - just tea with milk and a soup for lunch - that's about it.
I do miss "real foods", but I don't miss feeling sick and nauseated all the time. I was just thinking today how wonderful it is to be able to work and focus on my patients without having to deal with severe nausea.